Dear person who left their shoes on our driveway,

Thank you for the kind gesture, but we’re full up on smelly old shoes here. I don’t mean to be ungrateful; I know that where you come from, the depositing of one’s old running shoes upon the driveway of someone you admire is probably a sign of great affection. Here, it only makes us wonder what kind of foot fungus you are trying to escape.

And, really, what were you thinking? I know it was sunny that day that you left them, but it wasn’t that warm out. C’mon, it’s Oregon. I guess you really just like being barefoot. But did you have to abandon your shoes completely? I’m sure they would have been perfectly happy being carried instead of grinding into the cement step after step.

This just occurred to me. Maybe your shoes left you! I suppose there’s really not much you could have done in that case, if they just refused to walk another step with you. You must have treated them pretty badly to get dumped by your shoes.

But just in case you feel like making up, they’re waiting for you on our mailbox. They may be enjoying their solitary time perched there, but perhaps if you approach them nicely they’ll relent and go home with you.

It’s worth a try.

Sincerely,

– Erin

Posted on Thursday, April 6th, 2006 at 10:30 am.
Belongs with: Silly Things, Photo Things.
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