(This post contains a BIG spoiler for the Star Wars novel Sacrifice. You’ve been warned.)

I know, I know.

Star Wars is not real. Mara Jade is a fictional character. Authors have a right to do what they will with their fictional characters. Yada yada yada…

But… do you even know how many hours I put into this website? Do you know how many more hours I spent longing to be Mara Jade? Or at least to meet her? Yeah, I thought not.

So, what do you think they did in the latest Star Wars novel? They killed her off!

Never mind the fact that I have not read a single Star Wars novel or spent more than thirty seconds thinking about Mara Jade for the last four years; I am still taking this personally. I wish there was some way I could rectify this horrible atrocity—but it seems the deed has been done, so all I can really say is…

… Mara lives, folks. MARA LIVES.

Finals week has me in its grip right now, so I don’t really have time for words. I just wanted to share this photo, taken a few weeks ago on a brief jaunt to the river, which has been gracing my desktop and making me giggle ever since:

I think this shot sums me and my friends up pretty well.

This one is for all you mp3 player—iPod or otherwise—owners out there who have ever faced the dilemma I am about to describe.

Picture this: you’re listening to your music. Alone.

It’s a fun, groovy little time for you, right? But it’s—let’s face it—a little bit solitary. What happens when you suddenly think to yourself, “Gee. I would really like to share this rocking Decemberists song with three to five of my closest companions.”

Up till now, if you didn’t have a pair of speakers with the proper connector handy, you were out of luck. But NOT ANYMORE! Now, all you need is your iPod, your earbuds, and—are you ready?—your mouth.

That’s right, folks! Your God-given oracular cavity is a perfect sound chamber to transmit your tunes to those standing immediately around you. Just follow these simple steps:

1. Turn on your iPod-like device.
2. Choose a rocking song.
3. Crank the volume.
4. Rest your earbuds on your lips, and close lightly around them. (Adjustment may be required to produce fullest sound.)
5. Watch your friends ooh and ah in amazement!

I know, I know… only a Gutenberg student could discover something quite so awesomely revolutionary. And trust me—there’s more where this came from.

A quick search through my archives tells me that I have not talked about the primary obsession of my formative years on this blog as much as one might think I would.

I am talking, of course, about Star Wars; and although you might not guess it by looking at me, I probably once could have given you a brief outline of almost every Star Wars novel in existence. (Especially those involving Mara Jade.) And that’s not even touching the wealth of knowledge about the films I gained by poring over the annotated screenplays.

Turns out my friend and housemate, Teal, is also a Star Wars fan. So when we discovered that the U.S. Postal Service was placing special “R2-D2″ mailboxes around the country in honor of Star Wars’ 30th anniversary, this was the only logical action which could follow:

You may feel free to point and laugh. We are immune.

I mean, heck… Teal was willing to stand in the middle of the UofO campus wearing a Mu-Mu inside out. I was willing to climb on top of a trash receptacle in the effort to capture the perfect shot. What do you think you’re going to do to us?

So. It was Easter today. You’re probably wondering: Did she do it again? Did she make the trek up Spencer’s Butte at dark-thirty in the morning? Did she toss her proverbial Easter cookies at the top?

Of course not, silly! Here’s what my friend Noah thinks of that idea:

Instead, a couple of us less-intrepid folk climbed ALL THE WAY to the top of the stairs at our house and watched the sunrise from our back balcony.

And then, after a blindingly bright ten or fifteen minutes, we retreated inside for coffee. And then we ate sticky buns.

All in all, it was a much more relaxed (and far less pukey) Easter morning than last year. I hope you all had good ones as well.